Dear Facebook Management Team,
Thanks to the extraordinary power of social networking and the innovative third-party applications you include on
Facebook, expats in Quito have been able to share their insider knowledge about life at 2850 meters. I am cutting and pasting it here today, with due acknowledgement that you own all of the words and images posted on
Facebook . . . maybe . . . whoever "you" are.
Sincerely,
The Cooloper
YOU KNOW YOU'VE LIVED IN QUITO WHEN (just a selection):
-there is a reina for everything!
-you have been called: reina, querida, preciosa, mi hijita, mi amor, guapa, gringa, mamacita...
-Futbol is more important than anything!
-if the doors on the bus still shut then it´s not full enough
-milk and eggs are not refrigerated??
-you know someone who has had a bot fly
-answering your phone catches you off guard. Why didn't they just text me?
-you can´t breathe at an intersection
-$3 for lunch is really expensive
-buses, taxis, motorcycles, police vehicles, and even the bikes honk at the gringas
-you have almost been killed crossing a round-about
-the street dogs are smarter at crossing the roads than we are
-you´ve stopped laughing at the names SuperMaxi and MegaMaxi...but you secretly still find them entertaining
-you can go from overheated to freezing in 30 minutes
-the Mariscal and Gringolandia are synonymous

Old Town Quito
Ivan Kashinsky for the New York Times-you wonder how in the world they get 121 songs on a cd and still sell them for a dollar
-the mountain view never gets old
-Coca-Cola is the new water and it even tastes better
-old town Quito feels like a different city
-you have become accustomed to breaking up the conversation for the 757 to fly over
-roses are 25 for $1 and still thought of as special
-all the buses have curtains with fringe on the windows
-a bus isn´t official if it doesn´t have a Jesus sign of some sort
-Slug bug mini-van!
-there are more KFC´s in all of Quito than in the state of Wisconsin
-there is a certain button on the taxi meters for gringos - it charges more
-there are three races outside of Latin: chinos, gringos, negros
-you have seen every Chuck Norris and Sylvester Stallone movie on the buses
-you have never seen so many different types and sizes of bananas
-you have no respect or care in the world for the police officers
-the electricity goes out for apparently no reason
-no hot water? oh well
-sometimes you need five different keys just to enter your house
-family dogs hang out on the roof
-you know it's 3:30pm because of the thunderstorm
-throwing toilet paper in the waste basket instead of the toilet has become a habit
-you still get upset when Terminal Terrestre charges you 20cents to leave the crappy place
-a credit card means nothing, just some plastic
-pizza delivery comes faster than the ambulance
-anything chévere is chévere
-the public are more scared of the president than the active volcanos that surround the city
-you have witnessed a political protest or overthrow
- a ceviche cures a chuchaqui
- you hand a cashier a 50 cent piece for something that costs 30 cents and they ask you if you have any smaller coins
- "Payless" is really PayMORE
- you have to wait about 3 days for your clothes to dry because they got caught in probably four rain storms being on the roof
and my very own . . .
- take-off is aborted because the
runway isn't long enough for the plane to get enough speed to take off
- you don't expect for the new airport to open in 2020, much less 2010, when it's scheduled to open
- you have asphyxiated from the dust cloud thrown up by the dirt track that will someday be the new runway